I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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