tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
