a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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