Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
We left the knife in your bed.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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