i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I am naked and annoyed.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
