that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Randomize
