Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
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