I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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