id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
