so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize