So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
