We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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