Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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