Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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