Pappa wants mamma naked
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
