Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I am never drinking with the goths again.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize