Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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