porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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