dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize