great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
