my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
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