i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize