After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises