i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.