Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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