Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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