is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
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We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
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Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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