I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
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I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
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It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!