She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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