her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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