Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I understand Curling. That high.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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