Do you still have your period?
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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