I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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