Jerry, you need to find god
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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