She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
