anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize