6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
