Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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