WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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