It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
