She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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