well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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