She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
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