Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
wow bdsm is so cute
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