Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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