walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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