North Korea, Best Korea!
i just google imaged poop.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
