Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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