would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...