He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
