just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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